AITA?
I’ve hurt my girlfriend repeatedly in our on-and-off, two-year relationship. Shes 24 and I’m 28.
I’m her first relationship. She’s been supportive and loving despite her own past traumas and insecurities. I, on the other hand, have acted immaturely, cheated, and made her feel insecure. Recently, out of fear of her leaving since it was taking her long(6 months) to get over my past cheating, I contacted another girl to be my gf, which broke her trust.
She asked us to take a few days apart so she can process her thoughts and let go of her pain so we could move forward together and she contacted me back on the weekend as she promised. But I thought she will leave me. I also acted from anger because I thought she was talking and seeing an ex colleague of hers and I failed to communicate that. She’s now emotionally numb, wants an open relationship (which I refused), and says she’s done unless I go to therapy. Despite the distance and her hurt/anger, she still shows care and I feel really down. I’ve had series of failed relationships and end up seeking validation from others.
I don’t understand myself because I know how scared I am of losing her because I love her a lot despite my actions. I’m taking accountability, ready for therapy, and trying to reassure her, she still talks with me but she’s still angry about everything. She is still trying to make sense of my actions and still is very hurt. Rightfully so it’s only been a week. She doesn’t feel comfortable being intimate with me until she can feel safe with me and until she sees proof that I’m attending therapy and is working. I know I’ve been selfish and added to her trauma, and I want to change. She wants to start therapy too. Can I still save this relationship?
