AITA for telling my 51 yo brother to stop being a deadbeat and just pay his back child support in front of his very rich wife?
Ok, so let me start this premise by saying I loathe my brother. He is a lifelong heroin addict, he has abused every person in the family except for me, because I won’t be victimized, he beat up our own grandmother and kept her hostage in her house for a week, he cost the family (relatives who owed him nothing) probably over a half million in legal fees, stolen cars, tools, goods, and damages.
He’s always had good luck finding women with money, and usually he ruins them, takes everything they own and trades it for junk and then they OD and die after they lose their kids to CPS. After his last stint in jail, which was admittedly probably 15 years ago, he met a rich woman who is in recovery like him, but while she is a doormat and completely supports him and puts him back in rehab every other year, he can’t seem to break her. She is the only one he can’t get to relapse, though he tries like hell. This woman is a straight up millionaire, and he signed a pre nup to get her, she is a evil rotten woman, and awful to her kids, but she is STUPID WEALTHY and protected her assets from him well. When he falls off the wagon and their stuff starts to disappear she ships him off to rehab and buys new stuff. They don’t have kids together, but both have kids from other relationships.
Anyway, his two kids are like 33 and 27-28? And they grew up with their very low income junkie mom just over the state line. We still have one or two older relations who will not stop inviting him to things, and they are not proud of a single person in the family for any achievement, but they are so proud of him for getting out of jail and marrying a rich woman. So they just love him, even when their lawn mower goes missing. I won’t have him remotely near my home, period, and for some reason I am the only relation he has never stolen anything of note from.
So he’s at an event, and I’m saying goodbye to everyone, because I don’t sit in for their pow wows on how successful he is and how proud they are… Well someone asked where his younger son is (IDK why, he doesn’t see them) and someone answered that the kid doesn’t drive (disabled) and brother starts in on how he could pick him up, if the kid’s mom did not have a billion warrants out for him in said state for unpaid child support.
So I say: Every time you want even a 5 figure sum for anything, your wife strokes you a check like it’s nothing she doesn’t even care how you spend it, why can’t you just repay your ex for raising your kids?
To which he starts the excuses about 2 times he gave her $250 in a money order he did not give her credit for, and another time he gave her a piece of crap minivan that not only broke down the next day, but she could not register because he took it from an elderly person he was manipulating and he couldn’t get the paperwork, but he feels the $2000 the van was worth should get taken off the top.
I told him he is more than half a century old and isn’t he tired of being such a loser he can’t cross state lines over $12k in unpaid child support? Just pay it! At least twice a year his wife just buys him a secondhand mercedes, but a reasonably expensive one, and within weeks he has it all taken apart and has sold it off bit by bit. There are mercedes carcasses all over their yard from all the nice crap she buys him just so he can dismantle it and sell it all off piece by piece. He can’t have a single nice thing because he wastes, breaks, or sells EVERYTHING. Can’t he direct even a smidge of the benefits of his privileged life to pay his child support and clear his name at 51? WTH!!!
Anyway, I “hurt his feelings,” and the family is up in arms at me for damaging the poor sad useless piece of crud… Supposedly I should have minded my own business, but he was disseminating his business in front of me. I have known my brother since I was born, AITA for asking him WTF his problem is and when is he gonna grow up?
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