Aitah for cutting off my husbands family!
I don’t think I am I’ll preface the post there. My husband thinks I’m being harsh.
Context: I married my husband 2 years ago but our wedding was ruined by two very chaotic cousins one from his side one from mine. We eloped but only after almost completely splitting up. His family on his mother’s side said some extremely hurtful and outright disrespectful things about and to me. Before we married I told him if we had children they’d never be allowed around me or my kids or in my home. He agreed. We maintained a good relationship with his father’s family but he was never close to them, it was a very surface level relationship.
We now have a baby daughter who is our pride and joy. His father recently passed and he reconnected with some of his mom’s estranged family. They were allowed(not by my approval, or with any warning) to attend our baby shower and it ruined the day for me in some small measure. I reminded him of my promise to not be involved with them and he seemed stunned but was quiet about it. It came up on a more heated note when they asked him to come see the baby and he discussed it with me. I said no kindly but firmly. Finally we were in a rush and the usual sitter said she was sick. He asked if they could just do it and I refused and cancelled our plans. I’m serious about this. He told me I was being an asshole for hanging on to shit. I haven’t even ever recieved an apology.
I firmly believe people who don’t respect or like you shouldn’t have access to your kids.
Edit: ok here’s some more context since you asked. The comments made were about my children from a previous marriage.i was married once before and have an 8 and 9 year old from that marriage. They said he shouldn’t marry me because I left my last husband and it indicated poor parenting to divorce. They said he’d likely be married twice if he married me so why should he be upset if one little wedding was ruined he’d probably have another one. They called me a hoe( not true) and yes the ones wanting to be involved are the ones who made the remarks. I won’t have them in my life. This is a hard line and I told him it was a condition of me agreeing to reconcile at all. He thinks 2 years is enough to just sweep it under the rug. I won’t.
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