Argument over daughter’s going out
Our 15 year daughter went out with two school friends last night. She left around 7:45 and I asked she be home at 10. One of the friends drove. She didn’t use a final destination but typically they end up getting fast food or something similar. She is terrible at making plans but I also don’t know many 15 year olds that play her entire time together – they just hang out and want to drive somewhere independently. We have never had reason to mistrust her other than once when she came back way too late. I have never suspected drugs or alcohol.
My husband was pissed that I could just let her go out without knowing where she will be – yet we have her on FindMy. He was seriously infuriated over this and could not understand why I wouldn’t be stressed over it all at. Well one friend is our neighbor and she had a very good head on her shoulders – does well in school, speaks respectfully with adults, encourages our daughter positively…The other is a boy they are both friends with and neither girl has interest in him. They hang out all the time and my daughter doesn’t give many boys the time of day to even talk to them. He’s a good one.
AITAH for defending our 15 year olds ability to go out and hang out with her friends? Why do they have to beat one set location the entire time for my husband to feel at ease? Plus I can see her on FindMy and call her anytime….i feel like I was turned into the AH in this argument and that I’m a bad parent for “not knowing where she will be”.

Dad Explodes Over Teen’s Night Out — Mom Says He’s Being Unreasonable

A mother is questioning herself after her husband explodes over letting their 15-year-old daughter go out without a fixed destination.

A simple night out for their 15-year-old daughter turned into a heated parenting clash that left one parent feeling like the villain.

The Backstory and Early Dynamics

The couple’s 15-year-old daughter asked to go out with two school friends. One was a neighbor girl with a solid reputation. The other was a boy they both regularly hung out with — no dating, no drama.
Mom agreed, set a clear curfew of 10 p.m., and tracked her daughter through Find My, something they already use regularly.

The daughter has no history of drugs, alcohol, or serious rule-breaking. Aside from one past late return, she’s been trustworthy.

To Mom, this felt like normal teenage independence.

To Dad, it felt reckless.

The Moment Things Shifted

Dad became furious when he realized their daughter didn’t have a single fixed destination.
No movie theater. No restaurant reservation. Just driving, talking, maybe grabbing food.

That lack of a “set location” sent him over the edge.

Mom tried to explain that teens don’t plan every stop and that real-time tracking meant they always knew where she was. Dad wasn’t convinced — and couldn’t understand why Mom wasn’t stressed at all.

The Final Confrontation

What started as concern turned into an accusation.

Dad implied Mom was being careless and irresponsible.
Mom fired back, defending their daughter’s maturity and questioning why constant surveillance and control were being mistaken for good parenting.

The argument escalated quickly — and somehow, Mom ended up feeling like the bad parent for trusting her own child.

The Fallout

Their daughter went out.
The curfew stood.
Nothing bad happened.

But the emotional damage lingered.

Mom was left doubting herself, wondering if defending independence made her an “AH,” or if Dad’s fear was actually crossing into control.

What Reddit Thinks

Verdict: Mostly NTA (Not the A-hole)

Many Redditors would likely side with Mom — while acknowledging Dad’s anxiety.

Sample reactions:

  • “You set a curfew, know who she’s with, and can literally see her location. That’s responsible parenting.”
  • “Dad’s fear doesn’t make him evil, but it doesn’t make you wrong either.”
  • “Teenagers need trust, not GPS-level micromanagement.”

Some might suggest compromise — like general plans instead of exact locations — but few would call Mom negligent.

A Final Thought

At what point does protecting your child turn into teaching them you don’t trust them?

And in a world of tracking apps and constant contact, how much freedom is too much — or not enough?

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