This Person Has Been Mailing Their Toenails to a Middle School Bully for Eleven Years and Honestly It is the Definition of Chaotic Neutral
We have all had that one middle school bully who made our lives an absolute nightmare, but one person on Reddit just took the concept of “long-term revenge” to a place that is both deeply unsettling and weirdly impressive. Imagine being a grown adult with a mortgage, a career, and a family, but once a month you sit down to perform a ritual that involves an envelope, a stamp, and your own body parts. If you have ever wanted to see what happens when someone refuses to let go of a grudge for over a decade, this story of Marcus and the mystery mail is going to leave you staring at your own nail clippers in silence.
The Original Poster (OP) was the target of a kid named Marcus back in the day. This wasn’t just “lunch money” bullying; Marcus was a creative architect of misery. He started rumors that the OP sh!t themselves at sleepovers they didn’t even attend and deliberately dated the OP’s crushes just to rub it in. It was the kind of targeted cruelty that sticks with you long after you’ve graduated and moved on. Or so we thought. Because in 2014, while the OP was in college, a random Facebook post from Marcus’s mom provided a home address, and a truly bizarre tradition was born.
That night, while clipping their toenails, the OP decided to put the clippings into an envelope with no note and no return address. They mailed it the next day, assuming it was a one-time thing to get the frustration out of their system. But apparently, once you start mailing your DNA to your enemies, it’s hard to stop. Eleven years later, the OP has not missed a single month. They’ve mailed these envelopes from different cities while traveling for work, making sure that Marcus receives his monthly “gift” no matter where life takes them.
The most fascinating part of this story is that the OP has absolutely no idea if Marcus even opens the mail. For all they know, these envelopes are being tossed in the trash, or perhaps Marcus’s wife has been opening them and wondering what kind of biological warfare she’s been drafted into. The OP doesn’t even care about the reaction. They just like the quiet, personal knowledge that these envelopes exist out in the world. It is a level of psychological commitment that borders on the legendary.
The emotional commentary here is a wild mix of “this is genius” and “this person needs a hobby.” On one hand, Marcus was a total ahole who deserved a bit of mystery in his life. On the other hand, the OP is now a successful adult with a wife and a “normal” life, yet they are still harvesting their own nails for a guy who was mean to them when they were twelve. It is a sh!t-show of unresolved trauma disguised as a very strange hobby.
Marcus apparently has a nice house and a happy family now, and the OP even went through the effort of finding his new address when he moved. It took ten minutes, which suggests that the OP is a very efficient stalker when it comes to postal logistics. There is something almost poetic about the fact that while Marcus is living his best life, a small piece of the kid he bullied is arriving in his mailbox every thirty days like a cursed subscription box.
The OP admits that there is “probably something wrong” with them, and honestly, they might be right. But in the world of internet revenge stories, this is surprisingly harmless. There are no laxatives, no hot sauce, and no k!lling the guy’s career. It’s just… toenails. It’s the ultimate low-stakes, high-weirdness move. It’s petty, it’s consistent, and it’s completely anonymous.
We have to wonder what the post office thinks about these envelopes. Are they marked as “fragile”? Do the sorters wonder why this one person always sends a slightly crunchy-sounding letter to the same house every month? The OP has turned their own hygiene routine into a weapon of silent, confusing protest. It’s a sh!t-show of a secret that they’ve finally typed out for the world to judge.
The internet’s reaction to this has been a mix of horror and standing ovations. Most people think it’s the funniest thing they’ve ever heard, while others are concerned that the OP is one step away from a horror movie villain origin story. But as long as it’s just nails and stamps, it’s hard to call them a total ahole. They are just a person with a very long memory and a very consistent grooming schedule.
This story is a vital reminder that you never really know what’s going on in someone’s head—or their mailbox. Marcus probably thinks he’s just a normal guy with a normal life, completely unaware that he is the recipient of a decade-long performance art piece. The OP isn’t looking for closure; they are just looking for a place to put their clippings.
So, is the OP the ahole? Honestly, they are just the king of the long game. Marcus was an ahole first, and while mailing nails is definitely “out there,” it’s the kind of harmlessly creepy revenge that makes for a great story. We hope the OP keeps up the tradition until they run out of stamps or nails, whichever comes first!
What would you do if you found out your childhood bully’s address? Is mailing toenails a “fair” revenge, or is the OP officially too far gone? Let us know in the comments if you think this is a sh!t-show of a secret or if you’re actually a little jealous of their dedication!
