AITA for telling my ex that she needs to “figure it out” when it comes to hosting people for her grandmothers’ funeral even through I am living in her “grandmothers’ house?”

My ex and I got divorced earlier this year. When we were married, we bought her grandmothers’ house. This house was built in the 1910s and had been in my ex’s family since then. It is quite large. It was de-facto the house where my ex’s family would stay when they came into town for anything (this continued into our purchase of the house and was a part of my decision to divorce her).

When we bought it, we primarily used my pre-martial savings and inheritance. That was five-ish years ago. When we got divorced, the court determined that the bulk of the house (90%) belonged to me in accordance with our postnup agreement. My ex tried a number of scenarios where she would keep the house (or it would go into a trust for our kid) so it would stay “in the family.” The only thing I would agree to is selling the house, her buying me out, or me buying her out. We went with the latter because my ex did not have the money to buy me out.

The day after Christmas, my ex’s grandmother died. She had been sick for years and the reason we bought the house is because she could no longer live on her own and desperately needed money for end of life care. Anyway, yesterday afternoon, my ex’s cousin shows up at the house with his family. He drove into town for the funeral on Thursday. Apparently, he and his sister texted my ex and said that they would be staying at “the house” (insider family term for my house) and she indicated she was ok with that.

I called my ex and asked her why she volunteered my house for hosting people. She apologized and said she had been running around getting things done for the funeral. But, she asked if I would be willing to host because they really do not have space for people without using the house. I told her “no” and that they need to get hotels or whatever else arrangements. She said they do not have money to get everyone hotels and people are struggling financially. That there is plenty of extra room in the house. They could just be in the finished basement with their own bathroom, kitchen, entry, and exit. I told her “no.” She got quite upset and hung up on me. I told the cousin and his family that they cannot stay.

AITA?

Edit: (1) People seem to be assuming the house was discounted to us when we bought it. It was not. It had been on the market for a year and the price had been decreased multiple times with no offers for the listed price at any point. We bought it for the initial price it was listed for.

(2) My personal preference was that my ex buy me out of the house. She did not have the money to do so. My next preference was to sell the house. My ex begged me to keep the house. So, I agreed to do so.

(3) The trust idea she had would mean putting the house in a trust with a life estate to me and the remainder to my son. This would effectively prohibit me from selling the house. I have no intentions of selling now, but I refuse to put myself in a position where I cannot sell in the future if I decide I need to do so. But, I do have a trust for my son now (3 years old) where he will inherit my assets at the time I die.