AITA for using gloves before applying a cream to my Girlfriend’s back
He Wore Gloves to Help His Girlfriend—and It Sparked a Relationship Meltdown
A college boyfriend applying medical cream with gloves triggered a relationship conflict that left Reddit debating boundaries vs emotional support.
A college couple’s quiet routine turned explosive when a simple medical favor made one partner feel “untouchable.”
The Backstory and Early Dynamics
The couple, both 20 and living together in Germany, share a typical student life—classes, gym sessions, and independence away from their parents. After a few intense workouts, the girlfriend developed a mild skin infection on her lower back. It was small, common, and easily treatable.
The doctor prescribed a standard cream to be applied before bed. There was just one issue: the spot was hard for her to reach. So her boyfriend stepped in to help.
The Moment Things Shifted
To apply the cream, the boyfriend used a piece of plastic wrap over his finger. Not because the infection was dangerous—but because he’s extremely squeamish. He’s always been that way and says he struggles with visible skin issues, even mild ones.
For a few days, everything went smoothly. No complaints. No arguments.
Then she finally said it bothered her.
The Final Confrontation
She told him she felt disappointed—and hurt—that he seemed “disgusted” by her condition. To her, the plastic covering felt like a message: you’re gross.
He tried explaining again that it wasn’t personal. It was just how he’s wired. But she pushed back, saying his behavior made her feel untouchable.
That’s when he snapped.
Feeling unappreciated and misunderstood, he called her dramatic and ungrateful. He pointed out that he went to the doctor with her, remembered to apply the cream daily, and never once complained—yet was still being criticized.
In anger, he told her she could apply the cream herself if it was such an issue.
The Fallout
Now the apartment is tense. She feels emotionally rejected. He feels unfairly attacked for trying his best despite his discomfort. And both are wondering who crossed the line first.
What Reddit Thinks
Verdict: Mixed—but leaning NTA
Many Redditors would likely sympathize with both sides, but slightly favor the boyfriend.
Sample responses:
- NTA: “You still helped her every day. Using plastic doesn’t mean you love her less—it means you know your limits.”
- Soft YTA: “Intent matters, but feelings matter too. You could’ve reassured her more instead of snapping.”
- NAH: “This is a classic clash of emotional needs vs personal boundaries. No villains here—just bad communication.”
A Final Thought
When helping someone you love, where’s the line between personal boundaries and emotional reassurance? Is effort enough—or does how you help matter just as much?
