“AITA for saying that my ex in laws need to unblock my number while they have my children if they want to take them anywhere?”
I 35f separated from my partner 42m almost two years ago. We have three children together ages 15, 8, 7. A lot has happened from then and until now. Without getting too much into details I’ll just say there are criminal charges and safety concerns where my ex is concerned and I have sole physical and sole legal custody of all of my children.
My ex is court ordered no contact with my children. The problem arises because his family wants to have relationships with my children which is fine as long as they respect me as the parent. However, that is not what happens.
They constantly do things without getting my permission first. Or even informing me. And they see no problem with this. As much as this bothers me the one thing I cannot let slide is that I have said that I will not let my children go anywhere with them if they will not unblock my number while my children are with them?
There have been times where my kids were with them and I couldn’t reach my child on their phone and I attempted to get in touch via the adult only to find that I was blocked.
My calls go straight to voicemail and my text messages do not go through. I know this because I had to get a different phone in order to get through. I feel this is unacceptable and inappropriate. I need to be able to communicate with whatever adult they are with while they are with them.
AITA for setting this boundary? While my older children have phones, my younger ones do not. Also I don’t feel it’s appropriate for children to have to be the messenger between grown adults. It’s not their burden to bear.
This is what people had to say to OP:
thelexuslawyer said:
Sounds like you shouldn’t let them have contact because you can’t guarantee they won’t let him have contact. Btw I do divorce law.
OP responded:
Yes that’s been my stance. But we got forwarded to family law and that judge ordered that I allow visitation with his family. But that same judge also ordered visitation with him and then the other courtroom criminal court placed criminal protection orders to prevent that.
Capable-Contact6868 said:
Stop letting them have your children period. You are not nearly going far enough.
OP responded:
I was court ordered to allow them visitation. I tried to bar them from having contact but the judge wasn’t having it. They are still ordering me to go to mediation even though he cannot have contact. It makes no sense but they tell me I have to follow court orders.
Hopeful_Bath_4337 said:
I have a strong feeling that your in-laws are allowing your ex to see your children. I would not allow my in-laws to have my children with me being there to supervise.
And BoysenberryJellyfish said:
NTA If you can’t contact the person who has your children, they don’t get the
