AITAH for being upset that my husband wants to return the Christmas gift my kids and I got him?
I (35F) went back to school to become a teacher so I can spend more time with my three kids. Money has been tight because of tuition and an 80-mile commute. One of my kids is autistic, so flexibility matters a lot for our family.
My husband (39M) and I do not share finances—his choice. We split the mortgage, but everything else is separate. I cover all kid-related expenses.
On a recent vacation, my husband left behind an expensive pair of sunglasses he loved. For Christmas, the kids and I pooled our money and bought him a replacement pair. He didn’t get me a gift, which didn’t bother me.
He’s going on a boys’ trip in February and asked to borrow money from me to pay for the Airbnb. I agreed.
When the sunglasses arrived, they didn’t fit quite right. Today he asked if he could return them, give me the money, and “call it even” for the money he borrowed for his trip.
Our kids were right there, excited for him to try on the glasses. I told him no—that it was a gift from the kids and me. He repeated that he’d just give me the money back. I told him that meant he’d be paying me back with my own money and walked away upset.
Now he’s mad at me for my reaction.
AITAH?
Edit: All 3 children are his
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